Why I cant get myself back and be active in writing.
I even tried to get myself motivated by the stories of others earning online.
In that maybe, just maybe I can get myself write but then again, just that it.
I know from the very beginning that writing is not for me, but still I am trying hard.
I find it cool, but not that I wanted to look cool (slight?). It's just that if only I could turn my idle time into something productive...aside from doing puzzles, sewing (seldom), photoshop (once in a while, but as of the moment...it is my everyday thing now due to work), surfing online, watching bunch of series (including kseries), fb-king and tweeting...one that I would really really wanted to be my hobby is Writing! Oh yeah with me having lack of vocabulary, poor at spelling, even if I have so much stories to tell and thoughts I wanted to share...I could hardly start and go on. Whoah it all just come flooding on my head...i really hope to spill it all out in writing and not just to get it all stuck in my head.:(
"usually writers are voracious readers themselves" I believe it so and that makes me a frustrated writer as well.
I'd like to be a writer in as much as I wanted to be a voracious reader. I am a blogger but not certainly a writer I hope I am. I couldn't and it is a shame to call me writer because I am so way way far near being one.
I like to read but I can't stand to read. Ang labo ba!? When I read I start to see the images in my head at some point that I stop seeing the word. From seeing double and end up going to the world of lovelandia.*lol* Facile way to treat my insomnia when I really wanted to get into bed. Any book will help me sleeps. So I doubt if any fiction novels can fixate me. I have this shelf of different novels like complete set of Harry Potter, Tolkien stories, some of Dan Browns, of Mitchy Albomns and others that I grab from booksale authored by I don’t know, bought it because the title caught my attention but that just it.
Writing. I was in elementary when I started making journals and during that time I literally start each entry with “Dear Diary” and talk to it as if it was a person that can hear, react, cry and laugh to what I am saying. When I was in highschool I even make some short love stories. In college, I kept numerous organizers/diary notebooks. And now I am a blogger. Who would have thought that such title would exist in the future huh? All this was to no avail; I remain a hapless wannabe writer.:D
I noticed that i am already one month in blogging last Nov 8. Checked the statistic of my site and it has a total hits of 1,798 in one month. Feels good to think that my blog has actually a readers. I have always been into writing since my highschool days. I used to have this little notebook where i jot down all the happenings of my highschool life. And i brought it until college. I have this journal in college that i wrote all my secrets, sorrows, frustrations, happenings, everything. I cannot remember anymore when and why i stopped.
I remember in my highschool i also actually tried to write a novel out of my first love. Dont know really if that can be called first love when in fact we did not even had a relationship and he did not even know i have a feeling for him. I love to write then, but ended up all just an attempt because i did not finished even one story i started. I am poor in english and (untill now, hope to improve by this blog anyway) i cannot find the exact and right words to express what i wanted to tell in writing. The only one person got to read all my unfinished story was my mother. She found that notebook. "Shem!"
Then here i am again back in writing. And am actually sharing it with you. Dont care if i do it right or have a really messed up english in here. I can write in tagalog or in bisaya anyway but still i prefer english.(",) The difference this time from my journal before is that i cannot post all the secrets, my frustrations and pains. Of course meron din ako nun..TAO lang. Everyone who know me or us always believed that we are such a perfect couple. They would say.. What else you two can ask for? You are so blessed that you can have evrything you wanted and asked for. "Sigh" That is true we are almost perfect, almost. Nothing is perfect. That is the reality of life. We have also ups and downs. Sometimes almost wanted to give up with each other. If you had already seen our PicAlbums. You can see only smiles, sweetness and a pictures of a contented couple we are. If only camera can have a shot of our unhappy moments..=) I dont understand why is that people always wanted to complicate their lives. In case of us.. trully that we are very blessed compared to others. Maybe also because it is the undeniably fact we as a human is always craving for something. We are never contented. I am never contented??
Enough now. What was that am talking about? I am just blabbing. *smile* Dont be bothered. We have too many happy moments and that cannot be overcomed by only one thing of foolishness. Drama lang po...hehe.
